Hi. It's been a while since we've last talked.
My have things changed.
As I look back on previous posts I feel a whole mess of emotions being poured over my head. Am I crazy? I sure hope not. I don't think I am. But you really never know.
I'm in a very moody mood tonight. That kind of mood where you just can’t stop the pictures flooding into your head of all sorts of things. Things that have happened and things that you are just plain scared of happening. It’s one of those “take a look at your life” moods. It’s not exactly the way I would wish to spend my evening, but there’s no stopping it once it comes. So I decided to embrace it. Write about it. Then maybe I can get some sleep.
I'm thinking of oh so many things. Of friends long gone. Of friends I’ve just made. Of my immediate family and of distant relatives. About God and heaven. About my cat and the puzzle I never worked. About Tom Sawyer and Frodo Baggins. About going away to college. About quiet times and Pikes Peak. About Winnie the Pooh.
I told you it was random. Can’t say I didn’t warn you.
I’ve been thinking a ton about my old friends. Friends that I used to be so close to. We were best friends. And now we barely even speak to each other. Not that there was a fight or they moved away, our lives just simply began to go in different directions. We were all traveling on this one path and then suddenly. Poof!!! The path goes in a complicated twist, constantly getting tangled up in itself. That’s how it feels. We’re all going in roughly the same direction but our paths are all so different. I miss the olden days. I’ve been watching old home videos lately and oh how I wish I was five again. Life was so easy. So happy. Running through a sprinkler in the yard was the best thing ever and cutting the junk mail was my favorite pastime. But not so anymore. Life gets oh so much more complicated the older you get. Suddenly there are cell phones and car payments. Jobs and paychecks. Boys and parents. Drama and the stress of living; High school in a nutshell. Why? Why do we have to grow up? Sometimes I wish I could fly off with Peter Pan and Wendy and go to the land of Capitan hook and mermaids. The place where nothing ever changes and you stay young forever. But this is not the case. This can’t happen. We just have to embrace the change and make the most of it.
In other news; Ashley has found herself a boy. A boy by the name of Jackson Moore. A boy so wonderful she doesn't understand why he chose her. Now I’m sure you're thinking, "If I scroll down two clicks, I see a whole book about why she doesn't want to date until she graduates" yeah well I don’t blame you. It’s crazy how much things can change. How many events happen in between the times where you sit back and look at your life from a bird’s eye view. This is one of those times for me. A time to just sit back and watch a playback of my life over the last few months. Wow. What a whirlwind of craziness!
About four months ago I never would have been able to imagine my life as it is now. I mean. Having a boyfriend was unheard of to me then. Oh yeah I wanted one, but I wasn’t about to fall into that trap. But then suddenly I did. I fell and I got trapped. But what a happy trap it turned out to be. It’s everything I could have asked for and more. He’s a wonderful boy who treats me right. We just seem to click in a perfect way. But you may ask, “Why did you change your mind?” and my answer; it just happened. Everything just seemed right. I asked my parents about it, I prayed a ton, and it just all sort of fell into place. I truly feel like it is something that God is saying “this is good” to. I have no idea what the future holds, but for now I'm just taking each day, one at a time.
I suppose that concludes my ranting of the night. I'm going to go to sleep.
Goodnight Moon.
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